Image. http://blog.syracuse.com/family/2008/06/trex.jpgFAMILY LIFE, PARENTING
FAMILY LIFE BLOG
HOW TODAY'S WORLD AFFECTS YOUR FAMILY BY GINA CHEN
FIERCEST ANIMAL ON EARTH: MAMA TYRANNOSAURUS REX
By gchen
June 14, 2008
http://blog.syracuse.com/family/2008/06/fiercest_animal_on_earth_mama.html
Do you ever feel like Mama T-Rex? Post a comment.There's an odd bit of trivia that I think I learned on the Discovery Channel, although I can't be sure. It is this: The fiercest animal on Earth isn't the male Tyrannosaurus Rex, but the female -- protecting her young. That resonates with me so because that's just how I feel. Hurt my child, and you've pierced my heart.
Now I may not eat you with my pencil-long razor-sharp teeth, but there's a feeling that wells up when your child has been hurt that feels like no other. This isn't a knock on dads. I think fathers feel the same way as moms about this. (Although, I'm not sure the male T-Rex does, but I can't be sure.)
I just had an incident where that mama T-Rex feeling welled up inside me. I was crying on the couch after an emotionally charged week. My 5-year-old daughter made her sweet little attempt at empathy.
"Mommy, why are you crying?" she asks. I told her I was sad and left it at that.
She seemed to want to show me she understood my feelings. "I was crying yesterday at school," she explains.
I ask why. "I couldn't write my H's right on my paper. My lines were too close," she continues. "And my teacher told me it was my worst paper ever. I cried, but I wiped the tears away."
My heart nearly broke, picturing my sweet baby crying because her H isn't perfect. And my first instinctive response was: Why would her teacher say that? What was he thinking? Mama T-Rex is bracing for a fight.
Now I know her teacher, and he's a friend I respect. And I realize that children's recollections -- or anyone's recollection in a moment of intense emotion -- may be mired by the heat of their feelings. But still!
I hugged my baby and told her I don't care if she can't make a perfect H -- ever. She just needs to do the best she can. And sometimes even grown-ups say things they shouldn't that hurt people.
As I held my little girl, I really understood what empathy is -- to really get what another person is feeling. My little girl, young as she is, immature as she is, got how I felt. And her empathy made me feel better. Mama T-Rex went back to sleep.
